Failed Attempt at Cylon Remake of Pulp Fiction
There was a scene in last week’s Battlestar Galactica, “Six of One”, where “Caprica Six” brought two Cylon Centurions into a meeting room. The ones, fours and fives were all represented there, and they tell her to get lost. In reply, the two Centurions open fire on everyone present while Six watches. The whole episode had Cylons double-crossing each other, culminating in this massacre.
This immediately reminded me of the hit job scene in “Pulp Fiction“, in which Samuel L. Jackson and John Travolta are sent to kill some people that crossed Marcellus Wallace. “Jules” goes into a diatribe of “Ezekial 25:17” every time he whacks somebody. I’m thinking, “How cool would it be if the Cylons recited that same line before gunning everyone down?” I might even be able to get ”Cavil the Cylon” to play the entire “Brett” role in post-production.
So I decided to make it happen. First, I located a copy of the Battlestar episode online and set it to download. Second, I located a recording of the scene from Pulp Fiction in MP3 format. Once I converted the file into WAV format, I was able to use a free Vocoder program to make the speech sound like the classic Cylon voice. I just needed to merge the two and perhaps juggle some scenes to allow more time for dialog. This would have been sweet.
I say “would have been” because I failed miserably. There were several problems. First, the copy of the episode would not open in Adobe Premiere Elements. It crashed the program repeatedly. While trying to figure out how to work the Vocoder, I located and downloaded a second copy, but it didn’t work either. I even tried to split the files up into smaller pieces, in case Premiere was having trouble opening larger files.
Then the Vocoder output would not load into Premiere either, and it would only play in “Media Player Classic”. I updated my audio and video codecs, but no luck there either. It took forever to get the Vocoder program to work properly, so I was in no mood to try another tactic. So I gave up. Too little return for too great an investment. Maybe someone with more video talent than I will take up the cause?
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